I will address this.
The 3 components for brevity that I will highlight.
The performer.
This is a person too. Does the person who sells their body for a buck need to be in therapy, yes. You cannot devalue yourself as a product for sex and not have issues. This is built into the cake, the damage is there, recommend a competent Therapist to help you process.
The consumer.
You are affected physiologically and psychologically. Therapist Jordan Peterson talks about the psychological component in this video: Dangerous effects of porn Researcher Andrew Huberman talks about the physiological component in this video: Dangers of porn addiction
The affect on YOU.
I’m a Therapist licensed for clinical work in the state of Illinois, and I own my Life Coach. Absolutely, I see this, whether you’re on the performance or consumer side of sex work, I will talk to you. Doesn’t matter if it’s OnlyFans, pornography, Cam Girls, the name of the game is payment for performance. This is transactional. Money changes hands, you pay to play. My role, talking to you in therapy or my Life Coach, is simply to help you process the choices that you make. I’m not the morality police, this is your life, these are your choices. But what you do, affects you, that’s what I help you process.
In my work, sexual dysfunction and sexual repercussions are prevalent.
No sex relationships - TOP OF THE LIST
Open marriage
Affairs
Gender identity
Swingers
Casual sex
OnlyFans
Pornography addiction
Sexual abuse trauma
Erectile dysfunction
Doesn’t matter who you are, if you’re a human on this planet, you’re affected by sexual dysfunction and sexual repercussions. It can be dating dilemmas at minimum all the way to sexual abuse trauma at maximum. You’re not immune to complex relationship dynamics, you too, are affected.
Sometimes sexual issues are the presenting problem. Other times, its peripheral but they will still come up in therapy or my Life Coach.
I also do couples counseling, asking about sex is part of the Intake session, the first time I meet a couple.
For individual clients, my Therapist mentor’s style, is to bring up sex in the first session. I bring it up early within the first few sessions but in context of the dating dilemmas or relationship scenarios the client is involved in. You cannot be a Therapist and not have sexual dysfunction, sexual abuse trauma and sexual repercussions as prevalent factors. Affects everyone.
For myself, it’s not about titillation. I do not ask details unless I think it contributes to understanding relationship dynamics, I even stop the discussion, if it’s information that’s irrelevant to the work we’re doing in that moment.
Examples of relevance:
I’m not interested in what sex positions you were in for your OnlyFans account. That’s not relevant to the work. I am interested in the reason that you perform sexual acts on camera. That’s relevant to the work you’re doing in therapy.
I’m not interested in how long you lasted during your 1-night stand. That’s not relevant to the work. I am interested in the emotion you felt being with someone new after a dry spell. That’s relevant to the work you’re doing in therapy.
I’m not interested that you’re juggling multiple partners for sex. That’s not relevant to the work. I am interested in which girl is just sex vs the one you feel is special. I am interested in which guy you’d introduce to your friends/family vs who you keep hidden as your casual fling. That’s relevant to the work you’re doing in therapy.
I throw out these generic scenarios, can be anyone and anywhere, very common.
Doesn’t matter if it’s casual sex or no sex, it’s the thoughts and emotions behind the sexual activity, that’s relevant for processing motive. You have sexual decisions to make for your romances and relationships. The repercussions of those decisions will affect you, that’s what’s important to process.
It’s far from titillation, it’s prior trauma and current thinking, that matter for therapy and Life Coach. Sexual titillation is for your bar stories or gossip with friends, I’m not interested in that. I want to help you with motive, repercussions, decision making and processing. That’s the work.
In my Substack which is my relationship newsletter, I advocate for family and core values. Those are my biases and beliefs.
For my clients, their life choices are their own. It’s in the Social Work code of ethics, that we value client self-determination. In laymen’s terms, that means YOU choose how you want to live your life. My role in therapy and Life Coach, is to help you process. I take what my clients say they WANT, and we go from there, see what we can do. That’s the work.
Choosing to process is very important work.
If YOU get on camera to have sex for your OnlyFans account, OK.
If YOU prefer 1-night stands, OK.
If YOU juggle multiple sex partners, OK.
If YOU have an affair, OK.
If YOU have an open marriage, OK.
If YOU like to watch porn, OK.
There’s a differentiation between my personal biases and beliefs that I promote on my personal Substack which is my relationship newsletter vs the self-determination that’s important for my clients.
Self-determination means that YOU choose how you want to live your life. In therapy and Life Coach, we process pain to get to pleasure. That’s the work.
I will be succinct.
If you pay to play, doesn’t matter if you’re the performer or the consumer, transactional sex affects you.
I’m interested in how the sexual decisions that you make, affect your romances and relationships. That’s the work, process pain to heal and process choices in order to make decisions that help your life.
If you have an Only Fans account, that will affect you. That’s baked into the cake. Process or not. That’s up to you.
rhmaldonado.com
Photo: Sex work is transactional. OnlyFans is the latest iteration.
Again, great subject. People don't realize that the criminals who control our world use our passions to control us. Jeffery Epstein, and others like him, were/are tools of these criminals who used people's weakness when it comes to sex as a mechanism of control. They control governments, media, education, healthcare, justice, etc. by placing weak people (think pedo Dennis Hastert) in positions of power and compromise them so they're beholden to the criminal. I'd recommend the book Libido Dominandi by E. Michael Jones if you want to see how this technique has been used throughout history.